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‘Desire’ is a ‘holy thing,’ so own up to it and create

Dear Lucy: You promised to spend February talking about love, so here is my question. I have been taught that desire is a bad and selfish thing. ...


Dear Lucy: You promised to spend February talking about love, so here is my question. I have been taught that desire is a bad and selfish thing. I was told as a child that always thinking or talking about my own desires, ambitions or wants is just selfish. As a result, I was in a relationship and spent all of my time being a doormat and supporting my partners dreams and leaving mine on the table. I became mad, depressed and hard to be around and we eventually broke up. But now, I don’t know how to begin to pick up the pieces and work on what I want out of life. On top of that, I feel like an incompetent failure.

– Anne F.

Dear Anne: Maybe, the good news is that you are by yourself now and have the opportunity to focus on building a new understanding in yourself of your own self worth and abilities as a creator.

Desire has gotten a bad rap down through time because we don’t understand it. Did you know that the word “desire” means “of the Lord?” To me, that says that desire is a holy thing. In fact, it is desire or want that is the inspiration for the wonderful inventions we all enjoy. Edison’s desire to create electricity was so great that he made himself sick in pursuit of it. But how marvelously has that desire changed the world!

Desire makes great things happen. Your desire in this moment to find your life purpose will cause you to change in wonderful ways. So, the first step is to put desire in its proper perspective...it is the drive to create. It is how we learn and grow.

Step two has to do with learning to use desire with discernment. This can be addressed by asking the question, “Will this bring me permanent or temporary satisfaction; will it cause me to grow; will it benefit someone other than me; does it resonate with my values?”

When creating from a desire, it helps to choose to create in your life the thing that will stay with you as a life lesson because it caused you to stretch beyond where you are right now.  If you can do it all by yourself, without Gods help, it probably isn’t a life changing desire. We are only selfish when we do things without considering how they can serve others.

Sometimes just the fact that I learned and grew from my choice means it will serve others because now I have something to teach and share because I am a better me! And most of all, asking if this desire will cause me to do something that goes against my values is really important. Do I want this so badly that I am willing to cheat, or lie or steal to get it? This is the proper use of discernment with desire.

You want something different in your life. Don’t get bogged down in excuses for why you can’t have the life, the love, the experience that is calling to you. Allow yourself to own up to the urge to do, have and be more. Own up to wanting...it is what makes the human race so great.  It’s agreeing with limitation and self-criticism that causes problems. You also don’t have to take from another. Don’t beat down your desire with excuses for not moving forward.

Here is the last step. If you don’t like what you have today, can you picture yourself having the life you want? What does that look like? What does it feel like? Can you close your eyes and be the star in your own movie called life? Now after you have this movie and apply the questions of discernment to it pay attention to all of the reasons that pop into your mind to tell you that you can’t have it. Now, you are ready to ask the next really important question... “If I didn’t believe these objections that just popped up, what is the one step that I can take right this minute to begin the journey into my vision?” When you get that answer, write it down with today’s date and go get busy following that step. When you complete that step, you will be shown the next step. Each night make a list of accomplishments towards your goal/vision.

We are told that we are made in the image and likeness of our Creator. Our Creator creates. So do we. Once upon a time people thought the world was flat, that the best fuel was wood, that the best transportation was a donkey and the best light was a candle. Thank God for desire, discernment and the ability to create a better and better world.  

In the spirit of love,


(Check out Lucy Shaw’s website at http://www.heartworks4u.com. You may send your questions to her by U.S. mail to: Heartworks4U, LLC; 4646 Poplar Ave. Ste 201, Memphis, TN 38117 or by e-mail to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .)

(For help with the feelings that get in the way of prayer and peace of mind, get Lucy’s new book, “BE NOT ANXIOUS.” Order it directly from her at 901-907-0260 or go to her web site www.heartworks4u.com.)


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